twinkle lightly

Why have I learned to love and appreciate this

Just as it is coming to an end?

Why is the magic crashing down

Just as it hits its peak?

I’m terrified of losing you.

All of you.

But maybe even more than that,

I’m terrified of losing this feeling.

This feeling of happiness

And joy

And purpose

And loving

And being loved.

How selfish am I?

But in this moment of complete candor,

I can admit it.

I’m not just afraid of losing you.

I’m afraid of losing myself.

You have made me who I am.

Who I am today.

Five years ago I wouldn’t have understood this love.

This love for these people I’d always known,

But never loved.

These people I’d now give anything for,

If only to have them for

A few more weeks

A few more days

A few more moments.

Moments are all we’ve ever had.

Moments are turning to memories,

Faster than the leaves can fall from these summer green trees.

Moments are the gifts I’ve been given for the last three years.

Moments of laughter and tears,

Joy and sadness,

Nostalgia and excitement and understanding.

Moments that hang suspended.

Untouchable.

Will I remember every single day?

Will I remember every single sequence of events?

No.

Years from now I’ll have lost the playbill of events in piles of old shoes and leftover receipts.

But I’ll always have these moments.

They can’t be taken from me.

So when I feel the tears in my eyes,

And the lump in my throat,

And when we collide for a final hug,

And when I say goodbye to you for the last time,

And when I see your car pull out of the driveway,

I hope I remember those moments too.

It’s a moment we share just like the ones we’ve all shared for years.

The moments that spell out our friendship.

The moments that make up you and me into what we are.

And I hope you never forget them.

I hope they don’t fade away like broken Christmas lights.

I hope you hold onto them.

I hope, even as we come to an end,

We don’t lose moments we’ve had,

That we don’t yearn for the moments never had.

Instead I hope we reflect on what we were given.

Dwelling on what we were given.

Shining.

Sparkling.

I hope we’ve taught each other well.

I hope we always remember.

I hope we always shine.

I hope we always,

Twinkle lightly.

 

(based off the song by Talain Rayne)