“I guess this is everything,” I said. I clicked the delete button on the computer, erasing my final files. I stood up and turned around. My boss was smiling at me. I pointed to the filing cabinet.

“Everything is filed and squared away, all my files are on the server, and I made sure to put the extra instructions for the next intern on the USB.” She nodded.

“So…” I said. I picked up my keys. I clicked the power button on my computer for the last time.

“I guess this is it. You can text me if anything gets lost, of course,” I said. I reached into the coffee cup on my desk, full of paperclips, highlighters, and pens. I grabbed my favorite red pen.

“You’re going to do great at college, Hannah,” my boss said.

“Thank you for everything,” I said. She reached out and we hugged.

“Goodbye, Hannah!” the office begin to chorus. Everyone was waving and wishing me all the best. Was it just a year ago that I walked into this office afraid of the unknown? I looked into the bin where my newspapers came in each morning for me to read and clip. I had read my final newspaper that morning. The newspaper that had been full of stories and life for me each day was moving on without me.

I had clipped an article that morning, a freelance piece about bidding goodbye to the old, and looking towards new adventures. So apropos for my last day. The article in my purse, my pen in my hand, and goodbye on my lips, I turned towards the door.

“Goodbye!” I called one last time. It was Friday, and the whole office was packing up for the weekend. I pulled my hood up as I stepped off the porch. The rainy August day was uncharacteristically chilly. The rain made it impossible to linger in the bittersweet nostalgia. No time for that. I dashed to my car, and hopped in, tossing my bag onto the passenger seat.

As I pulled out of the parking lot, I thought back on the countless times I had pulled in and out of the parking lot over the past year. My first job, a job I loved, with people I had grown so close to was over.

I had only gone in that Friday to “tie up the loose ends.” But tying up the loose ends gives such a sense of finality. Preparing the space for a new employee. Forwarding emails. Deleting your files. Tossing all your sticky notes. Cleaning your desk and knowing that soon, someone else will call it their desk. Removing all the traces of yourself that you’ve so carefully placed around your space to give it a feel of home. Tying up the loose ends.

I had started the job as a paid summer internship, over a year ago, and I had grown to love it. I genuinely enjoyed coming to my desk each day to read the newspaper, write, and work on PR projects. It was something I had never taken for granted, because I enjoyed it so much. But I always knew it would come to an end one day. And today was that day.

As I pulled into my driveway, I thought about the memories of my job, and I thought about the future. Would I ever find a job like this again? Would all of life start as unknown as this, and yet move into a warm, happy home? Why was I leaving again?

The answers didn’t come, but the thought that life was moving forward resounded. It was time. It was time to take a step into the unknown, not unlike what I had done the year before at my office. I had succeeded at my first job, there was no reason not to take the confidence and skills I learned to my next job.

My first job will always hold a special place in my heart. It was my starting ground. It was what showed me I had the ability to do more than I realized. I would miss it, but I was glad that it had its place as long as it did.

I thought back to my office one last time, as I unlocked the door to my house. I thought about my desk, the mailroom, the front lobby, and the kitchen… The kitchen. I thought of my orange cup, still in the refrigerator with the coffee I had made the day before. So maybe I had missed a loose end or two? I suppose that’s only fitting as well. We leave a pieces of ourselves behind, everywhere we go. We touch and are touched by every experience, every environment, and every person. We take the lessons we learn to begin new experiences. And we keep our minds open to change and return. As hard as goodbyes are, they’re necessary. Life is full of loose ends that get tied, if only so the next ends can begin.